"I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes the second before you die. First of all, that one second isn't a second at all, it stretches on forever, like an ocean of time. For me, it was lying on my back at Boy Scout Camp, watching falling stars. And yellow leaves, from the maple trees that lined our street. Or my grandmother's hands, and the way her skin seemed like paper. And the first time I saw my cousin Tony's brand new Firebird. And Janie... and Janie. And... Carolyn. I guess I could be really pissed off about what happened to me, but it's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst. And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain. And I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life. You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry... you will someday." ---From Kevin in American Beauty

During my break of studying, I decided to browse on my spaces. Read this new blog of a friend of mine who I barely stay in touch due to whatever reasons....

She mentioned she heard some sweet words such as " you are my family..." she feels so warm in her heart. This also reminds me of another friend of mine who just left. Every time we meet, she always turns the center of conversation to me. Her comments are also full of appraisals... I find it hard to return sweet words back to her, not at least the same amount...

I realize the effects of sweet words. and the awkwardness I feel when I say them. It was not like this before. I know what happened. During my years of pursuing happiness in life, I did encounter some heartless, passionless people and my sweet words were fed to them to make them so proud that they took me for granted or even stepped on me. To those who really give sincerely, I can't give back anymore.

Isn't it sad?

I finally watched Sex and The City. I gave it three words: Fake,  Fake,  True.

Fake part 1, 45, 46, even 50 years old women, who are supposed to bear a lot of responsibilities in work and life, went through joy and hurt in relationship, who are supposed to know what to expect in life and work, and what to look for....in short, who are supposed to be witful...and calm, are screaming over labels and brands..like 18, 19 years old sth. They don't seem to know a bit more than 20 something new comers. Carrie has nothing to advise the young assistant, on the other hand, she has been learning from everything she said...like she has been through nothing during these years, except for those wrinkles..

I give it 10 for extremely shallow!

Fake part 2,  They all seem to be very successful in career. but what do they do again? What is it about them to be loved for? Are they supportive? Are they funny? Are they sweet? Do they cook? How are they different from others that the guys have to love them to death? Carrie talks to Big about love letters...what is the difference between that she was reading fairytale books to the little Chinese girl? Mr. Big looks at carries' shoes so passionately? It is such a big joke! Women can be angry for no reasons and the other part will be accomadating them by apologizing nonstop for months? Yeah, try in real life.

In comparison, "you've got mail" depicts the charm of intellectual connection and the solid base for long-standing relationship--the mutual understanding...duh! what does it give us in terms of what loves really is after you find it?

For this, I give it 10 for extremely corny.

Luckily, there is one thing true said by the movie. Wedding is not about bride and groom. Wedding is about business. Wedding should be about the two of them and a few close friends. So fluffy weddings are nothing but photo-shop posts. bride and grooms are nobody but actors, only that they have to pay for the show.

It somehow says something boldly there for people.

The movie is more or less worthy for sisterhood it shows. Sisterhood is indeed very important. Except for the part we don't scream every time we get together and don't seem to be excited about everything we talked about, we indeed were there to talk through important issues with one another. Collectively thinking makes us more witful than men our age and enable us to go through so many impossible stages in life, like single mom of 3...

Honestly, I love my girl friends and I am so proud of most of them. They are amazing and our inspiration for one another is our source of strength.

So much for Sex and the City. We should call it Sisters and the City.

First of all, let me tribute this to my sentimental friends, ladies and gentlemen. Your existences make the world a wonderful place to live. Salute to you!

I happened to watch pieces of the movie "You've got mail" for what-do-you-know-how-many-times". Every time I heard the soothe voices of both characters and their observations on tiny daily life matters, I wish I could be their friends.

The story is a love story. Not quite new except the "email" thing for the specific time. What is so refreshing to me is that they fall in love because they actually talk alike and think alike! In other word, they have mental connections!

How many times we have to see scenes like this: "the character just got out of a fight with his or her partner. she or he walks and walks...all in a sudden, she or he realizes and shoutes: I love him. I love him. ..." but love him/her for what?! Love needs no reasons? nonsense! Somebody has to make you feel differently, even his or her scent, smile, the way he/she listens to you...

Let alone those scenes like woman jump on man for no reason at all, or vice versa and later on it became love that makes the lovers seek for each other for ages...

Yet, "you've got mail" depict dreamy soul-mate for most of us. They talk about everything in life and they are so observative and take pleasure from every little thing. It is the base for love. Without it, everything is short time attraction.

How many guys can talk witty? How many guys can be as observative and not that confusing...? I am lucky I have a family made of intelligent man and young man. However, they don't talk about everything. One of them doesn't talk at all. We are together and we sense love because we are blood.

I am also lucky over the years I met a few wittful girl friends and guy friends. However after getting to USA, the successful rate in this regard is a lot lower.

It may sound like I have too much time. No, I don't. but I miss the mental connection. Without that, even among people makes me feel lonely!



So thank you for your wisdom, my friends. I am blessed for having you all.